Saturday, March 16, 2013

"I was spanked and I'm OK!" Really?

Let's talk about what's "OK!" 

Are you not easily upset?
Are you not easily hurt by others?
Are you not effected by others' opinions of you?
Are you unconcerned with "measuring up" to what others think of you?
Are you confident in yourself and who you are?
Are you confident that you are loved?
Are you not full of fears?
Are you capable of dealing with stressors without "freaking out?"
Are you confident in your relationship with your spouse?
Do you always feel loved by your spouse?
Do you feel like you matter?
Do you feel like a success?
Do you feel valuable?
Do you feel beautiful/handsome?
Do you feel worthy of others' love?
Do you have no issues with anger?
Do you have no issues with anxiety?
Do you have no struggle with depression?
Do you have no struggles with self-doubt?
Do you feel others respect you?
Do you have no eating issues or struggle with your weight?
Do you not have issues with drinking or drugs?
Do you have very little illness in your life?
Do you enjoy life?
Do you enjoy an issue-free disinhibited sex life with your spouse?
Do you do well when you have conflict with others?
Do you recuperate well when you have conflict with others?
Do you easily forgive others?
Do you easily forgive yourself?
Do you not hold grudges?
Do you easily come up with ways to repair mistakes you've made?
Do you not find contradictory opinions threatening to you?
Do you easily read blog posts you disagree with without your blood pressure rising or feeling the need to attack the person or mock them? ;)
Do you have confidence that God's approved you?

If you were spanked and you can answer yes to all these then...then yes, you can honestly claim that you were spanked and "you're OK."

So, what do you think?

Were you "spanked and OK" or...were you...just spanked?

I know I are saying this is unfair. That all that stuff is over the top! Unrealistic! No one could say, "yes" to all those! You want to say that the "no's" you had to some of those questions "are normal" and have nothing to do with being spanked or not being spanked, because EVERYONE has some issues! Ridiculous! Right?

Yes. "Everyone" does seem to have issues. But, that doesn't mean those issues are "normal" for humans to have them. And, actually, trying to compare yourself to others to determine if you're "OK" or not is not a true measure of "OK" because...People often confuse what's common with what's normal.

Over 90% of parents admit to spanking their children. That makes it common. Therefore, the majority of the world is going to be "like you" if you were spanked. The characteristics found in children raised in a punitive household and how that makes them turn out as adults is therefore going to be what's common. But, not...what's normal.

Find someone you know who has never been hit/spanked by their parents, but was instead talked to and taught lessons with words. (Not talking about the parents who are absent and don't do anything at all with their kids...I'm talking about the people who discipline their children but without spanking...ever...not even once.) Talk to them about how they are. See how OK they are? See what you think then? Then, see if you still wanna say, "I was spanked...and I'm OK..."

"I was never spanked...and I'm not OK!!!
I'm awesome!!"

In about 15 years you could talk to my youngest child and she will be able to tell ya how it worked for her. Till can click here to see how it's turning out so far...

For more reasons 
not to spank 
check here:

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