What do you clothe yourself in?

I was just thinking about "love" and how God IS love and what being a Christian REALLY means.

Romans 13:14...put on the Lord Jesus Christ...

What would that mean? And, what would that look like?

If you become...a police officer...a judge...a nurse...when people see you in that uniform they all immediately know what you are, right?

So, if you become a Christian...people should look at how you "clothe yourself" and see immediately that you are a Christian...true?

So, what would a Christian's "uniform" look like...and how would it be perceived?

I mean, when you look at a police officer's uniform... usually, you don't stand back, mouth agape and exclaim, "How beautiful!" True?

The church is described as "the bride of Christ" and we're instructed to "put on the Lord Jesus Christ..."

So...

Normally, when a woman puts on a wedding gown...(or any kind of fancy gown, really)...and presents herself after getting dressed...the whole room full of people will stop what they're doing and take a deep breath and you will hear a lot of,  "ooooohs" and "ahhhhhs" and fuss over how BEAUTIFUL the woman looks! Sometimes people will even be moved to get tears in their eyes seeing their loved ones all "dressed up." Right?

Even a woman who is not considered to be "beautiful" under normal circumstances...will make everyone simply go "wow" seeing her all dressed up...

Why is this? 

Romans 1 says everything we wanna know about God is glaringly obvious in the Creation around us...so what does this mean that the majority of humans are awed by the sight of a woman all dressed up like that?

Colossians 3:12 ...put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. 

As the "bride of Christ" if a person puts on Christ...they should look and be so beautiful inside that it would move people to tears...

So, when it comes to church...if the modern church was truly putting on Christ...like them or not...the world would look at them and be struck by their beauty...

Is that what we see in the world? Is that what non-Christians think of when they think of "Christians?" Or, is this what they see?

Protesting and pointing out stuff you think God hates...

Hitting/spanking helpless children in God's name...

Pointing fingers at everyone else's sin...

Do you see beauty here?

Then you don't see Christ.

This is how you clothe yourself in religion.

Religion isn't beautiful because it is focused on "sin"...

Christ, however, is focused on love...and therefore is beautiful...

A person focused on Christ, who IS love, will be beautiful, too...

Loving your neighbor as yourself...is beautiful...

Doing unto others as you'd have them do unto you is beautiful...

Like Romans 1 says...the truth is obvious...

Job 40:10
“Adorn yourself with eminence and dignity, And clothe yourself with honor and majesty."

Ephesians 4:24
...put on the new self, which in the likeness of God has been created in righteousness and holiness of the truth.

1 Peter 3:3
Your adornment must not be merely external...but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God...

What do you clothe yourself in? Your church doctrine? Your church? Or Christ?

The truth is obvious...

How valuable are your children?

So, you own two cars parked in your driveway one sunny Sunday afternoon... 

One is a fully restored 1958 Chevy convertible...valued at over $50,000...

Just look at it...

<dreamy sigh>

The other car in your driveway is a 1999 Ford Escort. You wrecked it twice in a blizzard in 2003. You backed into a tree with it after that party in 2007. The muffler fell off last spring when you ran off the road and over a mailbox after you almost hit that deer. This poor car is soon heading for the junk yard!

You're about to fire up the grill on this beautiful Sunday afternoon when just then a severe weather alert comes on your TV warning of possible golf ball-sized hail and possible tornadoes in your area!

You go outside and look up at the sky and all seems well to you. 

You have two cars in your driveway and one space in your garage. What do you do with the cars?

I would imagine that anyone with such a valuable investment would pull...the old classic car into their garage. Better safe than sorry, right?

Imagine that you were off at a friend's house in your neighborhood and saw that severe weather alert while your classic car was back home in your driveway. You'd probably drive home immediately (not wait till you actually SEE hail) and get that car into the garage!

The old beater that's soon destined for the junk yard? Eh. It'd sit there and get pelted by hail, right?

When something is valuable to us, we go out of our way to protect it, even when we don't see a threat ourselves. When something is not valuable to us, we don't. Simple, right?

How much would you say your children are worth? Would you sell one of them for $50k? Think they're worth more?

I had my first child in 1987...and did as had been done to me growing up and as I had been taught in Sunday School class by people I loved and respected: I whacked my kids when they were naughty. (In other words I spanked...but I hate that word! Sounds sexual to me!) 

One day, in 2008 I was asked by a friend what I thought on the subject and as I prepared to explain to her why she should hit/spank...I ran across this picture of an ancient shepherd's rod...

I had been "looking at the sky and thought it looked sunny" but suddenly...this "severe weather warning" flashed across my screen and I froze.

What is this? It's a weapon that the shepherds used for predators. The shepherd used his rod for hitting/hurting predators to protect the sheep. The shepherd didn't hit the sheep with this.

This changed the meaning of every verse that I'd ever read about "the rod." This changed the meaning of Psalm 23. The new interpretations of those verses horrified me! But, at the same time, I'd been "spanking" for over 20 years...and was about to give birth to my 8th child in a few months. I was still looking up into the sky and seeing sun...but...because my children were more valuable to me than a 58 Chevy convertible, I took protective steps in case there really was a storm coming.

And, since that time, I've read probably over 100 articles on the harm that spanking does to children. Harm far worse than golf ball-sized hail on a car. Far more devastating and hard to "repair" than hail.

And, what I've noticed is that there is a significant population of "Christians" who would be moved to protect a car...but rather than react in a "better safe than sorry" manner about this...treat their children more like that 1999 Ford Escort...Unlike me who when offered just one tidbit of information that suggested that I was doing something wrong and reacted...these people look at the evidence and just flat out deny that that evidence is there!?

Despite the endless succession of articles they see passing by on their news feed and despite the fact that people like me can give them over 120 reasons why spanking is wrong...they still just keep on doing it...

They wouldn't "argue" that there is no storm coming and stubbornly insist to leave their car in the driveway. Especially if they actually saw dark clouds and rain approaching. Yet, despite they have to spank their kids repeatedly for the same things...despite their children becoming aggressive...despite evidence they can see in their own family...they insist that hitting their kids is "God's way" and keep on...

To me...these "Christians" who insist that grown-ups hitting their small children to teach them lessons is God's way...ignoring all the arguments and evidence...I see these people like the owner of a 58 Chevy standing idly by watching hail pelting it saying, "What hail? I don't see any hail?"

It's something I'll never understand...and will always make me scratch my head and say...you guessed it..."What the hail?" 

I'm a little teacup judging loud!

So, I was at Disney yesterday...and learned a few lessons...about me...and one...I just have to mention...

It was close to 11pm...I had been scorched by 100º weather, rained on, tidal-waved by "Splash Mountain", peed on, and we're heading past the teacup ride...whatever it's actually called I forget...and my grouchy-been-crying-all-day 6-year old and my waaaay tired 4-year old light up and want to ride. Fine. It's only a 5 minute wait. So, we get in line.

They sorta' herd the "right amount of people" into this gated area and that's the people who go in each time there's a turn. When the gates open for the next group to go in and get on the cups we managed to be last going in and I'm not very aggressive/pushy so by the time we made it to the other side of the ride-area all the tea cups were "full". Full...as in there were like 2 people in each cup. I was finding it very annoying and rude that people were "hogging the cups" like that...but...I walked with the girls back to the holding area to wait for the next round.

The attendant sees me coming back and approaches the nearest cups with just 2 in each where it's obviously a group of four. I can see him talking to them and he turns and walks away and said, "You'll have to wait for the next round."

"Wow!" I thought. If that wasn't the epitome of rudeness!
(Isn't epitome a weird-looking word!?)

So, I stood there and commented to the lady standing next to me about how rude those people are. She looked at the mom in 1 cup with 1 kid and the dad in the other cup with 1 cup...with them smiling and waving at each other and she jumped on my bandwagon with me, "Yeah! Some people!"

So rude!

So, I smugly stood there in my un-rude self-righteousness and watched the tea cups go round and round. I thought, "I oughta' take a picture of them and post it on fb and maybe someone would know them and I could shame these rude people!"

THEN...I see it.

The dad...was in a cup with a boy of about 5 years old and they...were spinning like mad! Like Mad Hatters in tea cups! And, the mom...was holding...a 1-year old. Not spinning. Just sitting, holding, adoring, and smiling. One of the few few rides one can get on with a 1 year old at Disney.

Hmmm.

"Judge not lest you be judged!"
"Get that log out of your own eye before you worry about that other guy's splinter!"
"Let he who has no sin cast the first stone."

Jesus really shoulda' said something like that in the Bible so I'd know better than to act like that, huh?

Yeah.

Well, the message did hit me right away and I felt ashamed and stupid for my rash judgment of these people...and I even said something to the lady who had joined my bandwagon and she too was like, "ohhhhh..." Yeah.

I have had this lesson probably a quarter of a thousand times. (People don't say that. Isn't that funny? 25 is a quarter of 100 when talking money...250k is a quarter of a million...but...we don't say quarter of a thousand. Probably too much math. ;)) But, I have had that lesson at least that many times. So, I'm SURE that this time that lesson stuck, right?

30 seconds later the ride is over and I hear the lady who was on my bandwagon with me fussing with her husband about one of the kids. She gruffly says, "I'm just tired of this! He's not riding this! Take him out to the entrance!" and then the son is taken away protesting and crying with his dad while mom gets on the ride with the daughter. And, I thought, "Hmph...what is her problem? It's 11pm for Pete's sake give the kid a break! I bet she spanks her kids, too..." and on it went for a few seconds in my mind thinking about how rotten of a mom this lady was...

Hmmmm.

Guess I will need another quarter of a thousand lessons on not judging till I finally get it mastered...

:(

Do you parent like a Pharisee?

I think for the most part, Christians believe that the Pharisees missed the boat. Right? They had God right there with them and they missed Him. Not only missed Him they hated Him and killed Him!!! They see the ways of the Pharisees as superficial and short-sighted because they believed that they could "do" things to get them a relationship with God.

Over and over you see it on comment threads about "religion"...Christians defending Christianity as a relationship...not a "religion" (set of rules). But, at the same time, although most Christians would believe that being a Pharisee is not the way to righteousness...for some reason, the tendency is to parent like one.

How do I mean?


There are a lot of different parenting books out there by lotsa' different people...but there are really only two (in my view) basic philosophies (with lots of different ways to act them out). 

One philosophy of parenting is about controlling kids. Controlling, scheduling, structuring, laying down the law, punishing and being "in charge" of your kids. 

And, the other philosophy of parenting is more about "knowing" kids. It's about interacting, experiencing, responding, guiding, and enjoying kids.

Law means: the principles and regulations established in a community by some authority and applicable to its people; any written or positive rule or collection of rules; the controlling influence of such rules; a system or collection of such rules.

The first philosophy of parenting could be called, "Law Based".

Grace means: elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion or action; pleasing or attractive quality; favor or goodwill; manifestation of favor especially by a superior; mercy; clemency; pardon...

The second philosophy could be called, "Grace Based".

But, you might notice that almost all Christian parenting books focus on rules and punishment...they're all "law based", and they call parenting without rules and punishments, "permissive". 

Well...there's the trusty stand-by, "You'll know them by their fruits". Let's see some fruits of the two philosophies...

James 2:10

For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles in one point, he has become guilty of all.

This is why if you're going to run a law-based household, you'd better not make a mistake. You'd better be 100% consistent or else...

Kids notice that we keep them out too late one night so you can go to your small group...but punish them the next night for not being in bed on time. Kids notice that we punish them for breaking our laws, but, we completely disregard speed limit signs until we see a cop. Kids notice that we love talking spiritual in our small groups and we seem to love reading our Bibles (in which Jesus says to pay taxes) but the notice Dad took a job under the table for a while last summer...Kids notice that when we're at home we act one way and act another at church. Kids notice that we hit them for hitting. Kids notice that we force them to face someone and say, "I'm sorry" but when we hurt their feelings or offend them we don't seem to find apologies so important. 

Kids notice all this kind of stuff and it's called hypocrisy and it makes them mad. And, if you've raised them in a law-based household...they expect that when someone does wrong they should be punished...and they don't see you being punished. It's all hypocritical and all unfair. And, if they're not allowed to tell us how they're feeling, if they're not free to express this then...to vent their anger...they listen to angry music. They play violent video games. And, when they start to "act out" in real life to vent  their anger and frustration…we call it "teenage rebellion." And, in response to them reacting to our law-based parenting and hypocrisy in this way...we…amplify that which pushed them to be so angry in the 1st place and we give them more rules, more law, more disapproval, and we punish them more. We attempt to cage them. And, all it does is make them angrier and want to get as far away from us as possible. 

Law-based parenting is so common we have come to mistake it's fruit (rebellious unhappy teens) for being "normal". 

Galatians 5:4

You have been severed from Christ, you who are seeking to be justified by law; you have fallen from grace.

Modern Christian parents need to comprehend what it means that we are no longer under the law of Moses. The movement out there which is against "spanking" and what you see as "permissiveness" is no more permissive than God dying for your sins. It's grace-based parenting and the fruit of that is not rebellious teens. But, law-based parents see this grace the same way the Pharisees saw Jesus! "Of the devil!!!"

The Pharisees hated Jesus and Christians. They loved the law. They loved the rules and how "righteous" it made them appear and feel. You can parent like a Pharisee if you want but it won't raise up godly kids any more than the blood of bulls and sheep could take away the sin of Israel. It was for freedom that Christ set us free. If you choose to run a grace-based household rather than a law-based one, you will see that where the Spirit of the Lord is there is liberty. Not liberty TO sin (as law-based parents believe) but freedom from sin. And, he who the Lord has set free shall be free indeed!

So, I guess ya have to ask yourself...in your relationship with your own kids, what is your focus? Do you believe that your kids will grow up godly if they are obedient to your rules their whole childhood lives? Or, is your main focus in every aspect of your parenting the relationship? Do you parent how you preach that Christianity is not a religion (set of rules) but that it's a relationship? If you parent like a Pharisee but preach like a Christian...are you like the man who looks at his natural face in the mirror but when he walks away immediately forgets what he looks like? (James)

I'd say it's at least something worth thinking about...

A couplea' rowdy rebellious teens...haha...not hardly :)

Abortion Advertising

Advertising is important and effective. It's why companies paid $3.5 million for 30 second ads during the Super Bowl. Yep. 

Imagine this...there is a new restaurant in town. EVERYONE says it sucks. Waitresses are rude. The line is forever long. Food is not good. Food takes too long to come. Hostess has not got the mostest. The decor stinks. The seats are uncomfy. The tables are dirty. The air conditioning doesn't work so well so it's uncomfortable hot in there. And, the prices are really high! You get too little food for too much money! Forget it!

Do you want to go there?

What if you see a whole big long line of people holding signs telling you to go eat there...wanna go there?

What if the gov't passed a law requiring you to go there once a year?

Even tho' you've never been there before...you sure don't like that place, do you? You will likely even warn others not to go there.

Now, what if you get invited out to lunch and whadaya know? Everyone's meeting there? Oh geez. You don't wanna be rude, so you show up. How do you think all that advertising you heard will effect how you experience your lunch? Will you notice everything wrong with the place? Sure.

Do it the flip way...

New restaurant. EVERYONE is talking it up. Man is that the place to go! Whoo wee! Waitresses are SO nice! Food is excellent! Lots of it! Cheap! Hot! The atmosphere is incredible! Seating and tables are clean and awesome! The bathrooms are so clean and fancy you could eat off the floors! It's SOOOO awesome there!

Now what? You can't wait to go, right!?

What if there were people standing a mile long on the road one day holding signs telling you NOT to go there. You'd wonder what was wrong with those people, right? What if the gov't tried shutting that restaurant down? You might even write your Congressman and tell him about it, right?

OK...

Where am I going with this?

ABORTION. 

ABORTION...in my opinion...we do not have legalized abortion in our country because of liberals...leftists...Democrats...or anti-Christian beliefs...whatever the right wants to blame this on...

We have this problem because of...advertising. And, Christians are right there with the advertisers PROMOTING/SELLING abortions.

And, no...as far as advertising goes, I don't mean that Christians need to put more bumper stickers on their cars or wear more t-shirts. No. It doesn't matter how many petitions people sign...how many Facebook "likes" they put on unborn babies...how many pictures of their own ultrasounds they post...how many pamphlets they leave around...how many pro-life bumper stickers they display or if they have the "Choose Life" license plate...how many pro-life t-shirts they wear...how many pro-life organizations they volunteer for or give money to...how many pro-life politicians they vote for...because most Christians spend every day advertising, "Having a child will ruin your life!"

They do. I hear them all the time. I read the status updates. I talk to people. I overhear people. I see the looks on their faces when dealing with their kids. People think having kids ruins their lives.

I have heard "pro-life" Christians say things like:

"I don't know what I'd do if I had another kid! I can't HANDLE any more!"

"You have 8 kids? I only have 1 and I can't HANDLE them!"

"You have 8 kids? You must be a saint!"

"Toddlers are SO hard to handle!"

"Just wait till the TERRIBLE twos!"

"Ugh! You think this is hard wait till you have a teenager! They're the worst!"

"I never get any sleep!"

"My child drives me crazy!"

"I don't have the patience for kids!"

"I neeeeeeeeed a night away from my (2) kids!"

"Kids get in the way of doing ministry work!"

"If only we didn't have the kids we could do..."

"If only we didn't have the kids we could go..."

"Someday when the kids are grown we'll have money to do things..."

"When my kids are grown then I want to do (this fun thing)"

"Oh, that poor girl! She's totally ruined her life!" (said about a pregnant teenager)

"You definitely need to wait to have kids until you get a chance to live a little!" (have fun before all the misery begins)

It's why ladies follow, "Infant Management Programs" (Babywise) Because, "by golly, in the name of God I will not let this kid interrupt my life!"

I got pregnant when I was 17. No one said to me, "Wow! A baby! Your firstborn! How precious! Some people wait till very late in life to start families, but, you will be so young when your child is grown I bet they will be your best friend. Oh, having children is so wonderful. Kids are the best! Oh, you must be so excited!"

You know, those words would have been THE TRUTH.

No. I believed all the advertising. I believed that I had just ruined my life. Babies are smelly. Babies are messy. Babies cry. Babies are horrid selfish creatures that manipulate you to be held all the time and they end up taking all your time and money and leave you worn out and broke! Have a baby and you can never have any fun anymore unless you go broke paying a sitter! Work! Work! Work! That's all they are. A thankless job, at that! They have tantrums and they disrespect you all thru their childhoods and they're horrible when they're teenagers! And, worst yet I will have to miss out on all the partying and fun of college! Life as I had always dreamed of it was OVER! Wrecked! Ruined! Destroyed!

That belief I had was not based on any experience with babies, myself. I couldn't remember even ever holding one! The belief I had came from my culture. It came from hearing everything that everyone says about having babies.

The reason that in 2008, approximately 1.21 million abortions took place in the U.S is because those 1.21 million mothers were convinced that having a baby would ruin their life as they knew it. Ruin something. They didn't have enough money. They didn't have enough education. They didn't have enough time. They didn't have enough patience. Whatever it was having a baby was NOT better than whatever they chose to do instead. Working. Going to college. Anything was better than having a baby.

If any of you Christians out there hate abortion, you need to look at yourself and ask yourself what you think of having children. Do you love having them? No. Not do you love them in spite of the fact that they irritate you and are hard to "handle". No. Do you LOVE HAVING KIDS? Do you see each of your children as "something to handle" or do you see them like a $10 million dollar bill (aka something to be enjoyed)? Do you ENJOY having them as part of your life?

What believe about children is going to be what you advertise to the world every day with every word you speak about your children...

What are you advertising?

"Having a kid is the best most awesome thing in the world!"

or...are you advertising:

"Whatever you do DON'T HAVE KIDS!!!"

If every Christian in the world painted the picture that having kids was the awesomest funnest wonderfullest thing you could possibly ever do...that having a baby was better than getting a $10 million check...no one would WANT an abortion...

Voting pro-life won't fix the problem of abortion as long as Christians all think that having kids is a big pain in the butt and that kids are something to "handle"...this

If you care about the subject of abortion...it is as they say...you have to "be the change you want to see in the world"...

(There is another problem that Christians tend to have no respect for children either...and this too adds to the problem of abortion...but that will be another posting...)